I get really frustrated when I read productivity articles.
How to do more in your workday, how to hustle and work 14 hour days without burning out, the twelve apps you should use to automate your work life…
enough.
Here’s the backstory:
I’ve been in the workforce for 21 years now. I’ve managed teams since year three, and I’m now an executive at a growth-trajectory software company. If anyone knows about the “busy trap”, I do.
I’ve come close more than once to utterly burning myself out on work. (Mostly because my self-worth was far, far too tied to my professional accomplishments, but that’s for another post and my therapist’s notebook.)
Most people, when consulted on this affliction, would give me advice about how to do more in less time. Or how to delegate more. Or what apps to use or books to read or whatever system they use to get through tasks and email more efficiently.
Here’s the thing, though.
There is always more work to do.
As elementary as that sounds, it’s exactly that realization that helped me institute my one rule that has gotten me off prescription sleep aids**, helped me reduce my dosage of anxiety meds**, and all in all provided me with a better quality of life:
No work after 7pm on weekdays. No work on weekends that requires a computer.
It’s that simple.
And sure, I’ve broken it a couple of times for extenuating circumstances, urgent matters, or important projects.
But the point is that after-hours work is now the exception – the distant one – instead of the rule. And when it happens, I do what needs to be done, and then I put it down again.
But did my productivity suffer?
I didn’t do an empirical study, measuring how many tasks I completed before the change and after the change.
But I can tell you without a shred of doubt that, if anything, my productivity increased after the adjustment.
Because I slept. Because I arrived at Monday mornings refreshed, recharged, and ready to tackle work again. Because my brain had time to NOT think about challenges so I actually had a fresh perspective with which to tackle them the next time. Because I spent time with my kid and my dogs and my horse and reclaimed some life.
No one died. I didn’t miss deadlines. Our company didn’t go out of business.
In fact, they have a happier, more balanced, more productive employee.
I’ll admit I’m lucky. But.
While I work for and with some of the most driven people I know, they also understand how to prioritize. We have email conventions (like 911 in subject lines) that communicate when items are TRULY urgent (i.e. creating significant business risk or opportunity), and those are easy to filter with email rules.
My boss doesn’t work insane hours, either, and he doesn’t email me at all hours. That helps.
But even if you have those things happening, it’s up to you to draw boundaries because no one else will do it for you. I promise. You can take that from me, thanks to experience.
All the productivity tools in the world won’t do a thing if you’re just allowing the work to keep pouring in unchecked.
Unless you’re saving lives — and most of us aren’t — you have to draw the line and say “work can wait”.
And it really, truly can.
We don’t get merit badges on our gravestones lauding our productivity or our inbox zero or our slide deck design.
If you really want work-life, balance, you have to create it.
By doing something radical.
You have to do it by sometimes not working.
**remember, I’m not a doctor. This is a tale of what worked for me and my personal outcomes, and it was guided carefully by my doctors, but please let medication changes be the territory of YOUR doctor and YOU, and not my blog post. K?
Your writing is delightfully sassy. Never disappoints. Thanks for another great read. Dead on, as usual.
Aw, thanks so much, Sherry.
good one!
Thanks, Alex!
This is spot-on. A few twists: (1) I think mobile makes it harder to disconnect. And (2) I sometimes (used to) set aside weekend or evening times for writing, because I don’t get interrupted. But I compensate by taking back time coming in late or leaving early. I don’t necessarily recommend it, it’s just what worked for me.
The point is to set boundaries and stick to them. No boundaries and you’re a slave.
Ultimately I saved myself from this by quitting my job and working for myself, but that’s not for everybody either.
Mobile definitely makes it harder. I didn’t specify because I do allow mobile stuff in evenings but I find that pulling back the work stuff also, by default, minimizes my mobile stuff at night. I’ve had a long-established habit of reading a bit before bed so that helps, too.
As for weekends, I say do what works for you. I found that offline work (planning, outlining talks) is fine if I’m writing by hand, but limiting computer work is my key.
Whoa, things just got a whole lot easeri.
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Amber –
Dead on. There was a time when I worked “on-demand”, doing anything at anytime without asking the question “Why are we doing this and does it have to be done now?”. Part of it was the work ethic in my DNA, part of it was thinking that I was helping the organization succeed, and part of it was “I want to be a valued employee and be recognized and rewarded for that”. Fact it, I mostly became the Gunga Din of the organization (“Give it to Dean, he’ll do it”). The effort ultimately went from appreciate to expected and provided no career value and contributed marginally to the forward progress of the organization and nearly killed me.
I don’t do this anymore (don’t ask me about the bizarre out of body epiphany I had in a Starbucks at 9pm on the 3rd day of me doing work on my vacation) Now its 9-5. Period (with few rare and well-vetted exceptions of course). Guess what? The organization doesn’t suffer, I get the same recognition/non-recognition as before, and I’m not freaking mess.
I very much relate to this. I used to believe that my worth and the recognition of hard work would result directly from the sheer volume of things I checked off my list.
But as you so eloquently explained, I became the “give it to Amber, she’ll get it done” person. Which is great. For about two minutes, until it becomes an entitlement or expectation instead of a benefit to me OR them.
Like you I changed the ratio of exceptions and the walls didn’t crumble.
I’d add – not only is there always more work to do, there is always something that “should” have been done earlier – or there is always something SOMEone would think you were “behind” on.
If you can accept that, as you note, you will be a lot less stressed.
So when are you going to write about how to untie your self-worth from your job??? 😀
Ha, when I think I can do so coherently. Still working through it myself. 🙂
Great idea & I need to implement the 7pm rule, for sure. Stopping work is easy compared to turning off my brain, though. That’s the kicker for me.
Thanks for this great post, Amber! It inspires and comforts me. I’ll have to give the 7pm rule a try. Also really stoked that I discovered your blog. Subscribe, check! 🙂
“We don’t get merit badges on our gravestones lauding our productivity or our inbox zero or our slide deck design.”
That!
This is great! Hard to keep this in mind when starting a business and raising little ones, but I know this is something I need to keep at the forefront of my work/life balance.
Thanks
Once again you amaze me. I LOVE this post, and I’m going to post it on the wall in front of the toilet! Because then I’ll see it when I’m winding down, when I get up, and while I’m working! (I work from home.) I’m going to try to internalize it!
The problem is, I LOVE, love, love my work. So it’s hard to leave it. I lie there anyway and think about it. Every idea I get helps another child who failed at reading—succeed. And that feels SOOOOO good!