My insightful friend Tamsen has helped me realize something this year about my professional self that I didn’t quite realize with such clarity before: I’m the person that tends to go against the grain, but with the aim of forward progress.
I work very hard to toe lines and push proverbial envelopes, but never for the sake of being a renegade. It’s important to me to consider the impact of what I’m after and why. It’s definitely a bit of heresy, but with positive intent.
It’s a balance, to be sure, especially when you’re passionate about something. My passion has most certainly boiled over on occasion (just ask my boss David) and not always in the best way. But with every experience comes the opportunity to look back, reflect, and change my approach a bit to be more effective next time.
Do you feel like that person in your company?
There’s a difference between shouting “they don’t GET IT!”, and recognizing that as truth but being willing to do the heavy lifting toward progress. It’s hard work sometimes. Frustrating. Even seemingly hopeless sometimes when you’re standing in front of a very tall brick wall.
So here are a few skills I’ve had to pack in my hip pocket along the way, and that have helped bunches when making even small strides toward big, audacious goals.
Language
No matter what world we work in, we have lingo and jargon. In social media, we love to sling words like “authenticity” and “human” and “transparency” and “influence”, but sometimes we’re lousy about defining those clearly and putting them into proper context.
As an agent of change, you need to be able to explain your passions in other people’s language. That means using words and terms and frameworks that make sense to them, even if they’re a bit foreign to you. Especially when you’re pushing back on something. That’s when you can really surprise and convince people that you’re on their side, even if you’re pushing for change.
Perspective
I posted the other day that I think there’s a dearth of well-rounded social media “professionals” that can really understand basics of other areas of business beside their own. In my experience, you earn lots of credibility for your ideas and plans if you can clearly demonstrate that you understand at least basics of the other business functions involved.
If you’re a social media advocate that can put together a coherent budget illustration for your plans and explain how it might impact the sales process and buying cycle or the product development engine, you’ll gain allies and collaborators more easily. If you don’t know those things at the outset, it pays to do some research. Bonus points if you recognize when your plan may actually create more work for people, and help them understand the payoff or benefit (as well as how you’ll support them).
Patience
Most of the time, progress is gradual. It’s the rare company that’s willing to just toss their hands in the air, say what the heck, and go for something completely and utterly different than they’ve always done. Assuming that your company is like most in that it prefers to do things in smallish steps, put on your patience pants.
Accept and embrace small changes as they come, and be grateful if they’re moving in the right direction. Stay focused on the big picture, sure, but let yourself be encouraged and motivated with even micromovements toward the goal. It might take more meetings or more months than you wanted, but perseverance counts.
Negotiation
The long lost magic phrase: “Okay, if we can’t do that, what can we do?”
Boy, we can be an entitled bunch, thinking we’ve seen the light and that anything standing in our way is just an impediment to Progress and Change. We rail against the lawyers or the management or the policy makers and tell them they’re stiff, they’re shortsighted, they’re ignorant. But in fact, many of these folks really do want to help move the business forward somehow. In some cases, it’s their job to point out the risks involved.
But by empowering them to help you find a mutually agreeable solution or step forward, you’ve met them halfway, and you’ve illustrated that you understand your plans might actually be (gasp) imperfect. It gives you common ground on which to move forward together, instead of against each other.
Confidence
There’s a fine line between confidence and arrogance, and you need to know the difference. But confidence sells.
Confidence means doing your homework and owning your idea. It’s not a stance of knowing better than others, but expressing that you’ve spotted the start of a path, and that you’re willing to lead the walk with them. And confidence isn’t about having the answers, but rather knowing that if you don’t, you’ll do your best to find them.
Are these all key business skills overall? Maybe. Do we all have them? Not sure. Am I still working on mine? Heck yeah.
What would you add? Have you successfully gotten buy-in for a tough project or engineered a culture shift? What skills did you need to flex to get it done? And by contrast if you’re brave, what of your traits or tendencies has stood in the way of making progress toward your goals? (Mine: stubbornness).
Let’s have a chat.
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Amber, I love this post, and I only wish I had coined the term “constructive heretic” myself.
I think all of your points boil down to emotional intelligence. These are the skills that differentiate someone who is known for being difficult versus someone who is known for making things happen. A “constructive heretic” should be an absolute expert at understanding other people. Before you can influence people’s priorities, attitudes and feelings, you have to be good at accurately picking up on what those things are at the outset, be open-minded enough to fully understand the angles of those feelings, and have enough self-insight to keep your own attitudes from getting in the way while you’re doing that. It’s a lot to handle all at once! But if you can get good at it, the sky’s the limit.
Emotional intelligence is a good thing, Liz. I’m a big fan of those concepts. And you’re right that you have to be able to see things through other people’s eyes. That’s much of what I’m talking about with these elements. Thanks for commenting.
Amber, I love this post, and I only wish I had coined the term “constructive heretic” myself.
I think all of your points boil down to emotional intelligence. These are the skills that differentiate someone who is known for being difficult versus someone who is known for making things happen. A “constructive heretic” should be an absolute expert at understanding other people. Before you can influence people’s priorities, attitudes and feelings, you have to be good at accurately picking up on what those things are at the outset, be open-minded enough to fully understand the angles of those feelings, and have enough self-insight to keep your own attitudes from getting in the way while you’re doing that. It’s a lot to handle all at once! But if you can get good at it, the sky’s the limit.
Emotional intelligence is a good thing, Liz. I’m a big fan of those concepts. And you’re right that you have to be able to see things through other people’s eyes. That’s much of what I’m talking about with these elements. Thanks for commenting.
Thank you so much for this post, Amber! It could not have come at a better time.
There’s been a lot of talk around work lately about how we need to do social media…But there doesn’t really seem to be the desire to understand why. It’s like everyone is expecting it to be the silver bullet. However, your post reminded me that I just need to be patient and educate our staff in their own terms. I can’t just expect them to get it overnight.
Thanks again!
Allyson
Glad it was helpful! Patience is a virtue, but a hard one to swallow sometimes. Keep at it. Breakthroughs often take a lot of groundwork. Keep at it, and remember that you’re the teacher here.
Thank you so much for this post, Amber! It could not have come at a better time.
There’s been a lot of talk around work lately about how we need to do social media…But there doesn’t really seem to be the desire to understand why. It’s like everyone is expecting it to be the silver bullet. However, your post reminded me that I just need to be patient and educate our staff in their own terms. I can’t just expect them to get it overnight.
Thanks again!
Allyson
Glad it was helpful! Patience is a virtue, but a hard one to swallow sometimes. Keep at it. Breakthroughs often take a lot of groundwork. Keep at it, and remember that you’re the teacher here.
Once again this has been a very enjoyable visit to your blog
I absolutely love the quality of information you provide about social media
Before visiting your blog I struggled to find information of this quality
Mark McCulloch
.-= Mark McCulloch´s last blog ..Article Marketing Basic Strategies =-.
Thanks, Mark. Hope you’ll be back. 🙂
Once again this has been a very enjoyable visit to your blog
I absolutely love the quality of information you provide about social media
Before visiting your blog I struggled to find information of this quality
Mark McCulloch
.-= Mark McCulloch´s last blog ..Article Marketing Basic Strategies =-.
Thanks, Mark. Hope you’ll be back. 🙂
Coincidentally enough Tamsen and we were taking about you (and our mutual wonder at how you manage to create all this amazing content!) over lunch this afternoon. Personally I’ve never seen you as one who goes against the grain, I just tend to find you look a lot deeper at your own actions and the space around you than the rest of us (thank you for that by the way). Then again, we just might be looking in a similar direction.
The one thing that might be missing for me is Acceptance. I come from the world of manufacturing and retail are scared out of their minds when it comes to making their brand more transparent and open. There are some things that might take Patience to overcome, but there are likely to be others that they never will. While Negotiation has been an amazing tactic, being cognizant of what is likely to never going to happen and picking the right battles has gone a long way.
Thanks for all the amazing posts recently and glad I finally got up the guts to comment here (it only took me from IMS to now 🙂 )
.-= Michael Schechter´s last blog ..The Digital Tail =-.
Hiya! I’m so glad you came by, and that you had lunch with Tamsen. She’s pretty awesome.
You bring up a really good point, too. There are definitely battles that you have to leave be. Some you’ll never win, or that are pointless or more effort than they’re worth. That’s a hard place to be. But sometimes, I tell myself that leaving some things behind makes room for the things that *are* worth your energy. I left a stable corporate job to start my own business because I’d chosen my battles. Talk about a risk, hey?
But having the calm insight to look at your situation critically helps an awful lot, and takes a brave soul indeed. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Don’t let it be your last, okay? 🙂
Coincidentally enough Tamsen and we were taking about you (and our mutual wonder at how you manage to create all this amazing content!) over lunch this afternoon. Personally I’ve never seen you as one who goes against the grain, I just tend to find you look a lot deeper at your own actions and the space around you than the rest of us (thank you for that by the way). Then again, we just might be looking in a similar direction.
The one thing that might be missing for me is Acceptance. I come from the world of manufacturing and retail are scared out of their minds when it comes to making their brand more transparent and open. There are some things that might take Patience to overcome, but there are likely to be others that they never will. While Negotiation has been an amazing tactic, being cognizant of what is likely to never going to happen and picking the right battles has gone a long way.
Thanks for all the amazing posts recently and glad I finally got up the guts to comment here (it only took me from IMS to now 🙂 )
.-= Michael Schechter´s last blog ..The Digital Tail =-.
Hiya! I’m so glad you came by, and that you had lunch with Tamsen. She’s pretty awesome.
You bring up a really good point, too. There are definitely battles that you have to leave be. Some you’ll never win, or that are pointless or more effort than they’re worth. That’s a hard place to be. But sometimes, I tell myself that leaving some things behind makes room for the things that *are* worth your energy. I left a stable corporate job to start my own business because I’d chosen my battles. Talk about a risk, hey?
But having the calm insight to look at your situation critically helps an awful lot, and takes a brave soul indeed. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Don’t let it be your last, okay? 🙂
As usual, excellent post Amber,
And the comment from Liz bares repeating:
“Before you can influence people’s priorities, attitudes and feelings, you have to be good at accurately picking up on what those things are at the outset, be open-minded enough to fully understand the angles of those feelings, and have enough self-insight to keep your own attitudes from getting in the way while you’re doing that.”
That statement is HUGE, and I agree that I think it’s pretty much what you were hinting at Amber.
The most beneficial single hour of my college career, was when an expert in my field at the time (journalism) came and talked to us about dealing with office politics. He was a foreign correspondent for the Washington Post and could have talked about anything, but he chose to talk to us about office politics, and how critical it is to communicate well with co-workers! Had I really taken his advice to heart, it would have saved me numerous frustrations, and I’m sure led to more success.
Too often people think it’s the stuff they “know” that gets them ahead. But more often than not, it’s how they slowly help others along that ultimately propels them forward toward their own goals.
You need to listen first, figure out where someone else is coming from, and then build a bridge between the two of you. The bridge can be short or long, but it must be traversed first, before you can really get them to trust you enough to try something new, like a social media initiative. If I were hiring someone, the skills to listen well and make the other person feel listened to, would rank nearly at the top of my qualifications chart for any job.
I work with a lot of small companies on social media strategies, and they understand paid advertising. They often don’t understand and therefore won’t embrace creating their own content as partly an alternative to advertising, for example.
One company I met with yesterday had created a Facebook page, but they were dumbfounded at the notion of creating content to fill it, with a set strategy and goals. So I need to build that bridge. We’re not there yet. But they’re open minded, hence the Facebook fan page. So I know there’s a good chance that I will get them there.
So taking the time to listen and build those bridges to understanding I think, is often the most important part of my job, especially when it come to social media techniques.
Building bridges is such an undercurrent of what I’m pursuing this year, so thanks for making that analogy.
The people in business *always* trump the ideas themselves. It’s the humans that have to make it happen, and if we can’t make those relationships and mutual understandings work, the best laid plans will die on the table (to mix a few metaphors).
Stay with it, stay patient, and keep doing the hard work. 🙂
As usual, excellent post Amber,
And the comment from Liz bares repeating:
“Before you can influence people’s priorities, attitudes and feelings, you have to be good at accurately picking up on what those things are at the outset, be open-minded enough to fully understand the angles of those feelings, and have enough self-insight to keep your own attitudes from getting in the way while you’re doing that.”
That statement is HUGE, and I agree that I think it’s pretty much what you were hinting at Amber.
The most beneficial single hour of my college career, was when an expert in my field at the time (journalism) came and talked to us about dealing with office politics. He was a foreign correspondent for the Washington Post and could have talked about anything, but he chose to talk to us about office politics, and how critical it is to communicate well with co-workers! Had I really taken his advice to heart, it would have saved me numerous frustrations, and I’m sure led to more success.
Too often people think it’s the stuff they “know” that gets them ahead. But more often than not, it’s how they slowly help others along that ultimately propels them forward toward their own goals.
You need to listen first, figure out where someone else is coming from, and then build a bridge between the two of you. The bridge can be short or long, but it must be traversed first, before you can really get them to trust you enough to try something new, like a social media initiative. If I were hiring someone, the skills to listen well and make the other person feel listened to, would rank nearly at the top of my qualifications chart for any job.
I work with a lot of small companies on social media strategies, and they understand paid advertising. They often don’t understand and therefore won’t embrace creating their own content as partly an alternative to advertising, for example.
One company I met with yesterday had created a Facebook page, but they were dumbfounded at the notion of creating content to fill it, with a set strategy and goals. So I need to build that bridge. We’re not there yet. But they’re open minded, hence the Facebook fan page. So I know there’s a good chance that I will get them there.
So taking the time to listen and build those bridges to understanding I think, is often the most important part of my job, especially when it come to social media techniques.
Building bridges is such an undercurrent of what I’m pursuing this year, so thanks for making that analogy.
The people in business *always* trump the ideas themselves. It’s the humans that have to make it happen, and if we can’t make those relationships and mutual understandings work, the best laid plans will die on the table (to mix a few metaphors).
Stay with it, stay patient, and keep doing the hard work. 🙂
ahh, patience…sometimes I just get ants in my pants to do something!
Speaking of pants…thanks for giving me a visual…I’m sure I’ll get a smile just thinking of putting on my patience pants!
.-= Beth Coetzee´s last blog ..What are you doing for others? =-.
Hi Beth, I know it. We all do. It’s human nature. And that’s why the ones who master the art of patience and being methodical can often get far more done in less time. Timing and context matter a lot, and those can’t be forced.
Glad I could give you something to smile about! My patience pants are quite worn and frayed…
ahh, patience…sometimes I just get ants in my pants to do something!
Speaking of pants…thanks for giving me a visual…I’m sure I’ll get a smile just thinking of putting on my patience pants!
.-= Beth Coetzee´s last blog ..What are you doing for others? =-.
Hi Beth, I know it. We all do. It’s human nature. And that’s why the ones who master the art of patience and being methodical can often get far more done in less time. Timing and context matter a lot, and those can’t be forced.
Glad I could give you something to smile about! My patience pants are quite worn and frayed…
Hi Amber,
Very good skill suggestions (I need to work on the patience part!). I would add leadership to your list. I’ve received buy-in from managers on project ideas or culture shifts that I proposed because I committed to leading the charge. It’s one thing to recommend monumental change, but it’s just as important to step up and say you’ll take the lead on that change. Of course, having a strong team to support a leader is equally important. Leadership goes hand-in-hand with your suggestion of confidence. It’s not always easy to be a leader because when things go wrong, usually all eyes turn on you. I’m finding though that the risk is worth taking.
.-= Nikki Stephan´s last blog ..Three Lessons on Success from Lady Gaga =-.
Hi Amber,
Very good skill suggestions (I need to work on the patience part!). I would add leadership to your list. I’ve received buy-in from managers on project ideas or culture shifts that I proposed because I committed to leading the charge. It’s one thing to recommend monumental change, but it’s just as important to step up and say you’ll take the lead on that change. Of course, having a strong team to support a leader is equally important. Leadership goes hand-in-hand with your suggestion of confidence. It’s not always easy to be a leader because when things go wrong, usually all eyes turn on you. I’m finding though that the risk is worth taking.
.-= Nikki Stephan´s last blog ..Three Lessons on Success from Lady Gaga =-.
I love seeing how this idea is coming together! An unspoken quality that is persistent in all constructive heretics, of course, is, for lack of better word (for now), vision.
The person who makes change happen in an organization is the one who can see where the organization needs to change, and how. Patience and negotiation combine to create flexibility, because as you point out, much of that vision means being willing to adapt your expectations about when and how exactly the end goal will be accomplished. (It’s so rarely how goes how you plan it….).
Which means that constructive heretics also need wills of steel…covered in lots of lots of fluffy feathers.
.-= Tamsen McMahon´s last blog ..Brand-building in seven steps…really =-.
I love seeing how this idea is coming together! An unspoken quality that is persistent in all constructive heretics, of course, is, for lack of better word (for now), vision.
The person who makes change happen in an organization is the one who can see where the organization needs to change, and how. Patience and negotiation combine to create flexibility, because as you point out, much of that vision means being willing to adapt your expectations about when and how exactly the end goal will be accomplished. (It’s so rarely how goes how you plan it….).
Which means that constructive heretics also need wills of steel…covered in lots of lots of fluffy feathers.
.-= Tamsen McMahon´s last blog ..Brand-building in seven steps…really =-.
I think anyone in any trade would do well to strive for these traits. You have a need to see situations from above, not from 50,000 feet, but close enough to see all parties, all goals and all hazards, and be able to relay what you see to anyone who will listen. I would love to be relied on like this by someone! I think I’d be great at it. Here’s hoping!